Privileged

Definitions:

1. Enjoying a privilege or having privileges: a privileged childhood; privileged society.

2. Confined to an exclusive or chosen group of individuals

As crazy as it sounds, I think in some parts of my community or Black/African American/Urban society this word describes a individual in a way that is seen as "negative". It comes with a certain taboo that automatically classifies you as "lazy, selfish, bougie, a snob, or outsider".

I think my parents sometimes don't understand why I like owning a non-profit, or always choose to do things for friends, or share with others the way I do. I really don't understand how they can't figure out where 'the desire' to be this way comes from. My mother used to tell me this kintergarden story about me giving away a pair of14karat gold earring in exchange for some cute plastic earrings to a friend. I apparently was ecstatic about the exchange.

To me the funnier part of the story is when she had to go back up to the school to try and get my earrings from the friends mother and how the mother acted as if 'my friend' had never came home with my earrings... before a old fashioned 1985 beat down occurred the earrings re-appeared. 

I think the perfect combination of a young African American child in today's society is one that is financially provided for in ways of education, shelter, nutritious food, activities, love, religion, responsibility, family, and friendships. & To be able to have each of those elements in their livelihood as they mature into an adult. We all draw on our personal life struggles in our own way, just as those afforded "privilege" lives and childhoods, are able to help others ...if they choose too. What would our culture be like if we were all only "one type"?

Be Blessed....

What I love about being an Adult

Today I had a experience that made me think of when I was still someone else's primary responsibility.
It made me really stop and think about why I like being grown.

You ever feel like only people who really aren't GROWN say stuff like that?
I run into elderly people occasionally that seem to be very wise that say things like...
"Chile, I wish I was young again, free from decision making, bill paying, or worrying to much about life.."
Although 30's is no where near mid-life...and now a days I guess it's the new 20...right now I prefer it over 10.

But guess what in one quick leaf drop can make an Adult seem to have the same problems as a Child...

Lack of money. 

Yep.
I said it. #sucks right?

I dont want to share...

I am a only child.
But most times if I could I would share my last dollar.
My mom tells stories of when I would give away real jewelry for shiny plastic jewelry when I was a little girl if a childhood friend asked.

But....
Sometimes...I don't want to share.
This is still a rare feeling for me.
But I am not talking about materialistic things or items that be bought.
I am talking about a feeling. For a person.
A special feeling.
I don't want to share meaning, I don't want anyone but me, to have a similar feeling for 'this person'.
Is that unfair?
Has to be right? Because you can't stop others from their 'feeling'
Not even when you are obligated to that person and they are obligated to you.
Its not inevitable all the time..but definately possible.

How many people can YOU be infatuated/in love with at once?

Time...

Is it Just Me?

Is it just me or is time always wasted?


Is it just me or are you not using every living breathing moment you have to show appreciation for having it?


Is it just me or does time slowly drag by when we are doing what we dislike?


Is it just me or is there never enough time when we are doing things we love?


Is it just me or is it challenging for Myrica to focus on one task that fits into a realistic time slot at a time?


Is it just me or should we find ways to truly value this moment others don't have the privilege of re-living?


Is it just me or ....do you wish... you spent the TIME you spent on reading this blog  ...doing something else?

Is it Just Me?

Dependencies...

Help me out.
I lost a piece of technology that I keep my day to day life in...
Tasks, Notes, Schedule, Contacts, Email Accounts, Secret Passwords...
Not to mention it cost me $250 when first bought. And since I am a penny pincher even WHEN employed.

This I feel is a tragedy.

Or... is it?

What should I be more upset about?
The Monetary Value to Replace it?
The Fact that my Privacy and Identity are out in the open?
Or that I am at Current Lost on What I am supposed to be doing, how to go about it, deadline details, goal steps, reference reminders that all are nowhere else except for this now gone device?

Either way. In Life, no matter the tragedy. I only allow myself to be upset or unhappy about situations no matter how extreme for about 72 full hours before I force myself to get over it. And that is the max "myrica pity" time allowed. Then it's time to re-group, find the positive in the negative, and move on.
This is a material thing. A piece of technology I created a crutch for. I don't think I will allow myself the full 72 hours after I officially certify it as lost/stolen/speak to t-mobile.

In fact I choose to immediately re-cover and think smarter on where to save needed info and rely on my brain a little bit more the moment I hang up with t-mobile.
After all... how is the pity party going to help me remember the things I needed or get on top of changing passwords? Don't dwell in the negative... use it as a springboard to find the positive and plan for better habits.

:)

Comfortable

What makes you comfortable?


I definitely think my comfort zone has changed in the last ten years.
Who, or What, How I become comfortable has changed..
Not sure if it's for the better or worse..
But sense I tend to not care about labels or other's judgement I guess it doesn't matter...


I used to only be comfortable being accepted by "them" or "they"
Then it was... I Was only comfortable up under a man...
Sometimes only comfortable out in chaos of the streets... other people's houses, public events, lounges
Now I am comfortable with just being in the house by myself


...Maybe with the TV On. I could spend hours doing it as long as I could reach food. Funny how things change...


What makes you comfortable? What USED to make you comfortable? Think it will change in ten years? Hmmm.

Seamless Invisible Transitions...

From

back to...

Under the Radar... I have accomplished a move I wish to not completely broadcast to all of America until fully 'grounded'... Although I am here back home in the DMV... I won't officially acknowledge, admit, share specifics to all until maybe March 2012..


Why?
To Help myself Keep Focus on Primary Goals at hand...
1) Back in my primary job market of technology: Web Design for corporate and gov't entities (to butter my bread)
2) Get Accepted in and start at UMUC MS/MBA Program
3) Develop & play out daily... a new and improved cardio/training regime
4) Re-vamp my two businesses ...


How hard is it for one to re-establish themselves and gain comfort in a new surrounding, environment, day-to-day if you have to stop and inform the world instantly of your change? Well. I know my answer... what's yours?